Monday, August 31, 2015
Monday, August 24, 2015
Monday Lulz
And for our first installation of Monday #LULZ for the 2015-2016 season, brought to you by my team's new mascot.
Remember that time we did an auction draft for the second time, and still none of us knew what we were doing? Our "Uh... What is going on... I think I just peed my pants a little... hehe #lulz" face:
This was me the first 34 picks:
"What to do what to do what to do... Marshawn for $67? Too high. Eddie Lacy for $68? Too high. AP for $69? Too high. Le'Veon-out-for-2-games-cuz-of-drugz for $69? Too high. OH SNAP JORDY FOR 38??? STEAL.... wait a second.... #LULZLULZLULZZZZ"
And then Eric aka Comic Sans calls me out for my inactivity. There was a collective
"Ohhhhh snap" in the Google Hangout. And then a subsequent overpaying for Andre Johnson and Brandin Cooks on my part. You know, ego stuff.
Oh, and did I mention that time Andrew Poon "thought" he bid $2 on Jordy Nelson, when in fact he bid $38? Okokokok so I understood why Aaron bid $37 for Jordy, being on Autodraft and all. But I can almost swear that it took a good 3 or 4 seconds before Andrew bid $38, AND HE WAS IN THE ROOM. #LULZZZZTOTHEINFINITY He just might never live that down. ACLs can be partially torn, right? Like, just your minor ACL, not your major one. Right?
Oh, but this face can apply to a lot of people, let's see...
Aaron - Seattle D for $5 and Duron Carter for $4??
D.Lin - 39-year-old-Peyton Manning for $30??
Jeff - Nelson Agholor for $24?? (I'm not sure a player is considered a "sleeper" anymore if he's the WR you paid the most for in the draft. But then again, he might just end up being your best WR, considering your other WRs. Or he might just turn out to be Cordarrelle Patterson v.2.0)
Gabs - Not-a-starter-yet-Ameer Abdullah for $21??
Me - Victor Cruz for $15 and Alfred Blue for $12?? (But in my defense, I had moniez to spend. But still, the face applies.)
And in case you didn't see Aaron's scheming troll face:
The trolling ended his team up with Le'Veon Bell, DeMarco Murray, and Andrew Luck. Not too shabby, if you forget to include the part where his starting WRs are Duron Carter, Eric Decker, and Steve Smith Sr. Seriously, though, I Googled Duron Carter, and I'm still not convinced he plays in the NFL.
Finally, how we all felt afterwards:
Wake me up in two weeks when the NFL season starts.
So who drafted the best team?
In my opinion, Abraham, with Luke as a very close second. Both managed to grab quality WRs with at least one solid RB and a QB that can get the job done.
Worst team?
Aaron, hands down. If it were a league where you only had to play 1 QB and 2 RBs every week, then he'd win by a landslide. But it's not. I don't think I have to explain much more. Thanks for the $20, Aaron.
Shoutout to Justina for the best team name. It works on SO many levels. I can't even start to describe.
Remember that time we did an auction draft for the second time, and still none of us knew what we were doing? Our "Uh... What is going on... I think I just peed my pants a little... hehe #lulz" face:
This was me the first 34 picks:
"What to do what to do what to do... Marshawn for $67? Too high. Eddie Lacy for $68? Too high. AP for $69? Too high. Le'Veon-out-for-2-games-cuz-of-drugz for $69? Too high. OH SNAP JORDY FOR 38??? STEAL.... wait a second.... #LULZLULZLULZZZZ"
And then Eric aka Comic Sans calls me out for my inactivity. There was a collective
"Ohhhhh snap" in the Google Hangout. And then a subsequent overpaying for Andre Johnson and Brandin Cooks on my part. You know, ego stuff.
Oh, and did I mention that time Andrew Poon "thought" he bid $2 on Jordy Nelson, when in fact he bid $38? Okokokok so I understood why Aaron bid $37 for Jordy, being on Autodraft and all. But I can almost swear that it took a good 3 or 4 seconds before Andrew bid $38, AND HE WAS IN THE ROOM. #LULZZZZTOTHEINFINITY He just might never live that down. ACLs can be partially torn, right? Like, just your minor ACL, not your major one. Right?
Oh, but this face can apply to a lot of people, let's see...
Aaron - Seattle D for $5 and Duron Carter for $4??
D.Lin - 39-year-old-Peyton Manning for $30??
Jeff - Nelson Agholor for $24?? (I'm not sure a player is considered a "sleeper" anymore if he's the WR you paid the most for in the draft. But then again, he might just end up being your best WR, considering your other WRs. Or he might just turn out to be Cordarrelle Patterson v.2.0)
Gabs - Not-a-starter-yet-Ameer Abdullah for $21??
Me - Victor Cruz for $15 and Alfred Blue for $12?? (But in my defense, I had moniez to spend. But still, the face applies.)
And in case you didn't see Aaron's scheming troll face:
The trolling ended his team up with Le'Veon Bell, DeMarco Murray, and Andrew Luck. Not too shabby, if you forget to include the part where his starting WRs are Duron Carter, Eric Decker, and Steve Smith Sr. Seriously, though, I Googled Duron Carter, and I'm still not convinced he plays in the NFL.
Finally, how we all felt afterwards:
Wake me up in two weeks when the NFL season starts.
So who drafted the best team?
In my opinion, Abraham, with Luke as a very close second. Both managed to grab quality WRs with at least one solid RB and a QB that can get the job done.
Worst team?
Aaron, hands down. If it were a league where you only had to play 1 QB and 2 RBs every week, then he'd win by a landslide. But it's not. I don't think I have to explain much more. Thanks for the $20, Aaron.
Shoutout to Justina for the best team name. It works on SO many levels. I can't even start to describe.
Thursday, August 20, 2015
FF 2015 Thoughts
I really debated as to whether I should take up this blog again. I mean, having a kid is kind of a game-changer, but after looking back at last season, I couldn't help but fondly reminisce about the good memories made by all the drama, mishaps, making-fun-of, etc. I'll be honest, that was probably my favorite blog entry to write all season. And reading it again made me literally lulz.
Of course, taking all the credit for these blog posts is short-sighted, self-centered, and inaccurate. All the team managers provide the material, whether it be Eric's waiver-wire follies, Jeff's unhealthy obsession with a QB whose name rhymes with Shady, Justina's impeccably-timed-and-perfectly-chosen GIFs, Luke's (sometimes lack of) analytics and charts, or Andrew's immediate and much-welcomed integration into our league's smack talkery - it's all golden to me.
I also took some quick metrics at how last year's blog went, for those of you who may be interested:
- With my attempt at bringing in extra revenue, I've made a whopping $3.72 off advertizzzles. That's actually more than I thought I would get.
- The blog got 6,347 page views from August 2014-July 2015. That's up from 5,767 during August 2013-July 2014 and 5,055 during August 2012-July 2013. An upwards trend.
- The most viewed post was my analysis of the Joique Bell-Kelvin Benjamin trade with a modest 93 page views. Which, by the way, is no where near Justina's masterful piece on Points Against - the all-time champ of posts with 1,321 total page views. For reference, the next most-visited post is my Mock Draft 2012 piece, which only has 863 total page views. Justina wins at blog writing. But back to the Joique Bell-KB piece - my theory on why it got the most page views was because I tweeted it out and tagged both Bell and Benjamin in my tweet, so maybe they got freaked out that they might get traded and actually visited my blog. One can hope.
So in spite of the meager earnings and lack of popularity in terms of comparative page views, likely due to the entries having little relevance to the rest of the world wide web, I opted to take a page out of Charles Barkley's book and totally ignore these analytics. So, in going with my gut, I decided to pick up the burden of blogging again in 2015. At least for now.
I will not make any guarantees regarding consistency or quality, but I will do what I can, given the circumstances. It might mean nixing the predictions (which help you all remember to set your rosters anyway) or stripping the content of any valuable Fantasy Football commentary (which was mainly uninformed and misguided banter). But nevertheless - my first post!
Let's start by updating our wiener's list:
Luke - 3
Jeff - 2
Aaron - 1
David Lin - 1
Gabs - 1
Jen - 1
Khoa - 1
Mike - 1
Playoff champions:
David Lin - 3
Luke - 3
Eric - 1
Gabs - 1
Justina - 1
Mike - 1
Khoa - 1
"Medalists" (finished in top 3 either in regular season or playoffs)
David Lin - 11
Luke - 9
Eric - 6
Gabs - 5
Jeff - 5
Tim - 5
Khoa - 5
Justina - 4
Aaron - 3
Laura - 3
Mike - 3
Jen - 2
Lan - 2
Abraham - 1
David Li - 1
Duke - 1
Italics indicates the owner is no longer in our league.
Highlighed names indicate the owner earned this in 2014.
As you can see, David Lin is now tied with Luke for playoff championships, and all of our sophomore (and 3rd year - I see you D.Li) teams are now medalists, so a round of congratulations is due.
Looking forward, each new Fantasy Football season brings a clean slate for all, and this one is no different. We've retained most of the core components (people, scoring, draft format, FAAB), but two main factors have changed: commissioner and the stakes.
Regarding commissioner, we can rest assured knowing we won't have to deal with any more of this:
Let us never forget.
But regarding the stakes, if a person wins the regular season and the playoff championship, he or she could potentially get a 750% ROI. That's big time. I read somewhere that if you put some money into some mutual fund and let it sit for 20 years, it would DEFINITELY turn into, like, a million dollars PLUS. So suffice it to say that Adeline's college fund starts HERE and NOW.
Honestly, though, I'm hoping the added stakes element brings another level of excitement to it all. Not surprisingly, I've already seen glimpses of it:
While for others, I'm not sure what they are feeling:
But let's be honest, who is the real loser this season?
No, seriously - who is it?? I guess we'll have to find out.
I'll try to live tweet this auction draft. It helps me remember all the silly things people do come draft day. There's more than pride on the line this year.
Happy drafting!
Tuesday, December 16, 2014
TFW
Here is a conversation I had with myself.
"Hey girl . . . You know you're out of the playoffs now, right?"
"Yes, it's all over. Are you going to be okay?"
"Hey, hey now. Nobody likes tears in their burgers. Cheer up! Terrific Tortoises is still in!"
"You're right. You're neither the same Fantasy team nor the same person. I'm so sorry for equating you two the way everyone else has this season. How sexist of me. How about this? Eric's team is out!"
"You know, with DeMarco's hand injury, this is probably the most graceful way you could've exited. Be grateful, Justina. You looked good, girl."
"This will make you feel better."
And . . . SCENE.
"Hey girl . . . You know you're out of the playoffs now, right?"
"Yes, it's all over. Are you going to be okay?"
"Hey, hey now. Nobody likes tears in their burgers. Cheer up! Terrific Tortoises is still in!"
"You're right. You're neither the same Fantasy team nor the same person. I'm so sorry for equating you two the way everyone else has this season. How sexist of me. How about this? Eric's team is out!"
"You know, with DeMarco's hand injury, this is probably the most graceful way you could've exited. Be grateful, Justina. You looked good, girl."
"This will make you feel better."
And . . . SCENE.
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
TFW
Why did Jeffrey have three defenses on his team?
What's a cubix?
How does everyone out of playoffs feel right now?
How does it feel going into Week 2?
(This one does not move, but it's magical as it is.)
What's a cubix?
How does everyone out of playoffs feel right now?
(This one does not move, but it's magical as it is.)
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
Final Power Rankings and Predictions
Is this what you guys think of me?
Ok, you might be right. I caved in to peer pressure. The masses asked for it, so they got it. I spent a good amount of time on this entry, and I actually do believe it will be the last of the season, in spite of how much more you all may beg. So since there will be no predictions, I will give you my prediction stats for the year here:
Week 12 Predictions Record: (3-3)
Overall Predictions Record: (44-34)
And my predictions for the playoffs?
Week 14:
Seenie J over DeMarco Da Murrier
Unicorn Burps over Spider Pig
Charlotte Hornets over Terrific Tortoises
#myteamSUCKS over I'm Coming Home.
Week 15:
Seenie J over Unicorn Burps
#myteamSUCKS over Charlotte Hornets
Championship:
#myteamSUCKS over Seenie J
Yes, I really do think Eric can, and will, win it all. If anyone else wants to, they can enter into a playoff bracket pool with me. I'll take entries up until the Thursday night game this week. I'm willing to pay no more than $5, though. Hey, still easy money playaz.
Final Power Rankings
1. Seenie J (9-4) [2]
Jeff's team has won the regular season, with much help from solid draft picks Andrew Luck ($15!) and Matt Forte. His pickup of Jeremy Maclin was pretty crucial, seeing as how the rest of his WRs were terrible (he's still starting Michael Crabtree??). I will not hesitate to point out, though, that he has the second-lowest "Points Against" of the season, behind only Duke (more on him later). According to my own calculations, his Strength of Schedule was 12th in the league (which means he had the easiest schedule). After all, he did go up against Aaron and Duke twice. However, to be fair, his team finished with a league-best 1368.98 in "Points For." So one could argue that it wasn't his fault that the teams he was up against didn't score much - he still got the job done by scoring more than any other team over the course of the season. I will refer you to this amazing article written by one of our brilliant managers if you'd like further clarification on that topic. But to think, Jeff pulled this all off somehow without this guy:
Never gets old.
2. Charlotte Hornets (8-5) [1]
Abraham's team goes against any conventional fantasy football wisdom (or lack of) I may have gleaned over the past 12 years. Building around the backbone of WR superstars (Antonio Brown, Randall Cobb, Mike Evans, Alshon Jeffery) - the strongest corps in our league, if I may argue - he's been able to put together a strong sophomore season without consistent performance in any of the other relevant positional categories (Kickers don't count). His highest-scoring RB (Branden Oliver) is 32nd in scoring in the league! The most logical conclusion I can come to is he's been managing the crap out of his team, and it's paid off. Or sorcery of some sort.
3. Unicorn Burps (8-5) [3]
David was simply meant to lose to my team. Twice. That shouldn't detract from the solid season he built, though. He managed to work the waiver and trade lines without any FAAB money for the majority of the season, and I think it worked out OK for him. He's probably still wishing he hadn't spent all $100 on 5 players that he no longer has on his team (Kirk Cousins $30, Brian Quick $25 [trade bait], Larry Donnell $20 [trade bait], Justin Hunter $10, and Andre Holmes $15 - no I'm not letting you live down Kirk Cousins for $30). But going in to the playoffs, he's got a chance of making a deep run - maybe not due to the strength of his team, but due to the weaknesses of all the other teams (Similarities to the NBA's Eastern Conference, anyone?). He did end up having the 2nd easiest Strength of Schedule (playing me and David Li twice), but I think he just ended up with some unfavorable matchups, which could account for at least 3 of his losses.
4. I'm Coming Home. (9-4) [4]
Here's something that has me scratching my head. Duke managed to finish the regular season in 2nd place overall, even though his team only scored 7 more points over the course of the regular season than mine did (I finished 9th). Obviously, his success was largely due to his league-low "Points Against" BUT I have to point out that according to my calculations, he had the hardest Strength of Schedule in our whole league (the two teams he played twice were Jeff and Abraham). All sorts of head scratching still going on.
5. Spider Pig (7-6) [5]
Of all the teams that made the playoffs, with the exception of David Li's miracle of a team (more on this later), Luke has had the worst final 6 weeks of the season. He's lost 4 of his last 6 games (tied with Justina, and only one more win than Andrew), ranked 3rd-worst in "Points For" in that time span (behind only Andrew and David Li), and has resorted to starting Benny Cunningham at RB2 (2nd only to David Li starting Johnny Manziel - again, more on that later). And the thing is, trading for Peyton Manning and LeSean McCoy actually HELPED his team. Yet his team still sits at 5th in the league and in my rankings. Luke would like to thank his 5-2 record to start the season for that.
6. #myteamSUCKS (6-7) [6]
Talk about a late-season run. Eric is only one of three teams to win 4 or more of the last 6 games (the other two teams: Duke and Jeff). And not only did he win, but he scored 2nd highest or more during each winning week, resulting in the most "Points For" in the last 6 weeks... and did anyone notice that he's 2nd in "Points For" for the whole season??? I think it's safe to say he'll be carrying that momentum into the playoffs. And similar to another top-4 team (Abraham), Eric has done all these with some patchwork RBs. It's amazing what WRs can do for your fantasy football team these days...
7. DeMarco Da Murrier (6-7) [7]
A struggling Justina's team decided to pull out the big guns in the final week and romp her way into the playoffs. Well played. Without that last win, you would have joined Andrew in the lonely 5-losses-in-the-last-6-games hearts club band. Instead, you're just with Luke in the not-so-lonely 4-losses-in-the-last-6-games duo. And more importantly, with 7 other teams in the playoffs. Unfortunately, I have no other good stats for you except congrats on drafting the most dominant RB in fantasy football this season. You definitely could have done worse (AKA Luke and Adrian Peterson for $70 ROFLMAO).
8. Odoyle rules! (6-7) [9]
Because I write this blog, I'm going to tell myself I belonged in the playoffs. My team had a terrible 4-game losing streak in the middle of the season that ended up shooting myself in both feet and arms, and desperation called for some questionable decision-making in my trading and dropping of players. I ended the season with some ups and downs, and that's just how the game is played, folks.
9. The Pain Train (5-8) [8]
Does anyone remember who won the championship last season? I'm curious to know who Gabs would have kept and if that would have changed the course of this season. LeSean McCoy? Eddie Lacy? Dez Bryant? Julius Thomas? Philip Rivers? After seeing those names, I'm going to go with... No, it would not have changed the course of his season. Although Gabs's woes came mostly in the first 5 weeks, he didn't have enough left in the tank to overcome those woes and make our (AKA The NBA Eastern Conference) playoffs.
10. Terrific Tortoises (7-6) [12]
He did it. He made the playoffs. With a league-low 1118.30 "Points For" (that's an average of 86.02 points per game! Even the Philadelphia 76ers are averaging more points per game than that!... 91.5, in case you were wondering), he finished the season among the top 8. From Week 7 onward, his team scored 5th lowest or worse in each of the games (2 games @ 5th lowest, 2 games @ 3rd lowest, 1 game @ 2nd lowest, and 2 games @ absolute lowest). And yet they finished that 7-week stretch with a 4-3 record (which included a 0.30-point margin of victory over his Bae), and a ticket to the big dance. I'm not sure I can spin it any other way - it's pretty much a Cinderella story of Cinderella stories. Here's to hoping that story continues... Oh what?? Starting Johnny Manziel?? Nevermind.
11. Chou Chainz (4-9) [10]
Aaron had some kick in his team during the last half of the season, going 3-3 in the last 6 games. But his abominable 1-6 record in the first 7 games held him down too much. In all fairness, his team had the 2nd hardest Strength of Schedule (playing Gabs and Jeff twice), but it honestly all broke down the minute Yahoo! autodrafted for him. He spent a combined $65 on Zac Stacy and C.J. Spiller. #2014Lulz
12. OUCHsoclose (3-10) [11]
Jamaal going down was a dagger that Andrew just couldn't fully recover from. It's ok, doing poorly happens to almost all first-year managers in this league, for some reason. Just look at Abraham and Duke - they were pretty much in your position last year, and look where they are now. I will say, though, the added smack talkery and banter coming from Andrew was a much-welcomed addition to our league.
Ok, you might be right. I caved in to peer pressure. The masses asked for it, so they got it. I spent a good amount of time on this entry, and I actually do believe it will be the last of the season, in spite of how much more you all may beg. So since there will be no predictions, I will give you my prediction stats for the year here:
Week 12 Predictions Record: (3-3)
Overall Predictions Record: (44-34)
And my predictions for the playoffs?
Week 14:
Seenie J over DeMarco Da Murrier
Unicorn Burps over Spider Pig
Charlotte Hornets over Terrific Tortoises
#myteamSUCKS over I'm Coming Home.
Week 15:
Seenie J over Unicorn Burps
#myteamSUCKS over Charlotte Hornets
Championship:
#myteamSUCKS over Seenie J
Yes, I really do think Eric can, and will, win it all. If anyone else wants to, they can enter into a playoff bracket pool with me. I'll take entries up until the Thursday night game this week. I'm willing to pay no more than $5, though. Hey, still easy money playaz.
Final Power Rankings
1. Seenie J (9-4) [2]
Jeff's team has won the regular season, with much help from solid draft picks Andrew Luck ($15!) and Matt Forte. His pickup of Jeremy Maclin was pretty crucial, seeing as how the rest of his WRs were terrible (he's still starting Michael Crabtree??). I will not hesitate to point out, though, that he has the second-lowest "Points Against" of the season, behind only Duke (more on him later). According to my own calculations, his Strength of Schedule was 12th in the league (which means he had the easiest schedule). After all, he did go up against Aaron and Duke twice. However, to be fair, his team finished with a league-best 1368.98 in "Points For." So one could argue that it wasn't his fault that the teams he was up against didn't score much - he still got the job done by scoring more than any other team over the course of the season. I will refer you to this amazing article written by one of our brilliant managers if you'd like further clarification on that topic. But to think, Jeff pulled this all off somehow without this guy:
Never gets old.
2. Charlotte Hornets (8-5) [1]
Abraham's team goes against any conventional fantasy football wisdom (or lack of) I may have gleaned over the past 12 years. Building around the backbone of WR superstars (Antonio Brown, Randall Cobb, Mike Evans, Alshon Jeffery) - the strongest corps in our league, if I may argue - he's been able to put together a strong sophomore season without consistent performance in any of the other relevant positional categories (Kickers don't count). His highest-scoring RB (Branden Oliver) is 32nd in scoring in the league! The most logical conclusion I can come to is he's been managing the crap out of his team, and it's paid off. Or sorcery of some sort.
3. Unicorn Burps (8-5) [3]
David was simply meant to lose to my team. Twice. That shouldn't detract from the solid season he built, though. He managed to work the waiver and trade lines without any FAAB money for the majority of the season, and I think it worked out OK for him. He's probably still wishing he hadn't spent all $100 on 5 players that he no longer has on his team (Kirk Cousins $30, Brian Quick $25 [trade bait], Larry Donnell $20 [trade bait], Justin Hunter $10, and Andre Holmes $15 - no I'm not letting you live down Kirk Cousins for $30). But going in to the playoffs, he's got a chance of making a deep run - maybe not due to the strength of his team, but due to the weaknesses of all the other teams (Similarities to the NBA's Eastern Conference, anyone?). He did end up having the 2nd easiest Strength of Schedule (playing me and David Li twice), but I think he just ended up with some unfavorable matchups, which could account for at least 3 of his losses.
4. I'm Coming Home. (9-4) [4]
Here's something that has me scratching my head. Duke managed to finish the regular season in 2nd place overall, even though his team only scored 7 more points over the course of the regular season than mine did (I finished 9th). Obviously, his success was largely due to his league-low "Points Against" BUT I have to point out that according to my calculations, he had the hardest Strength of Schedule in our whole league (the two teams he played twice were Jeff and Abraham). All sorts of head scratching still going on.
5. Spider Pig (7-6) [5]
Of all the teams that made the playoffs, with the exception of David Li's miracle of a team (more on this later), Luke has had the worst final 6 weeks of the season. He's lost 4 of his last 6 games (tied with Justina, and only one more win than Andrew), ranked 3rd-worst in "Points For" in that time span (behind only Andrew and David Li), and has resorted to starting Benny Cunningham at RB2 (2nd only to David Li starting Johnny Manziel - again, more on that later). And the thing is, trading for Peyton Manning and LeSean McCoy actually HELPED his team. Yet his team still sits at 5th in the league and in my rankings. Luke would like to thank his 5-2 record to start the season for that.
6. #myteamSUCKS (6-7) [6]
Talk about a late-season run. Eric is only one of three teams to win 4 or more of the last 6 games (the other two teams: Duke and Jeff). And not only did he win, but he scored 2nd highest or more during each winning week, resulting in the most "Points For" in the last 6 weeks... and did anyone notice that he's 2nd in "Points For" for the whole season??? I think it's safe to say he'll be carrying that momentum into the playoffs. And similar to another top-4 team (Abraham), Eric has done all these with some patchwork RBs. It's amazing what WRs can do for your fantasy football team these days...
7. DeMarco Da Murrier (6-7) [7]
A struggling Justina's team decided to pull out the big guns in the final week and romp her way into the playoffs. Well played. Without that last win, you would have joined Andrew in the lonely 5-losses-in-the-last-6-games hearts club band. Instead, you're just with Luke in the not-so-lonely 4-losses-in-the-last-6-games duo. And more importantly, with 7 other teams in the playoffs. Unfortunately, I have no other good stats for you except congrats on drafting the most dominant RB in fantasy football this season. You definitely could have done worse (AKA Luke and Adrian Peterson for $70 ROFLMAO).
8. Odoyle rules! (6-7) [9]
Because I write this blog, I'm going to tell myself I belonged in the playoffs. My team had a terrible 4-game losing streak in the middle of the season that ended up shooting myself in both feet and arms, and desperation called for some questionable decision-making in my trading and dropping of players. I ended the season with some ups and downs, and that's just how the game is played, folks.
9. The Pain Train (5-8) [8]
Does anyone remember who won the championship last season? I'm curious to know who Gabs would have kept and if that would have changed the course of this season. LeSean McCoy? Eddie Lacy? Dez Bryant? Julius Thomas? Philip Rivers? After seeing those names, I'm going to go with... No, it would not have changed the course of his season. Although Gabs's woes came mostly in the first 5 weeks, he didn't have enough left in the tank to overcome those woes and make our (AKA The NBA Eastern Conference) playoffs.
10. Terrific Tortoises (7-6) [12]
He did it. He made the playoffs. With a league-low 1118.30 "Points For" (that's an average of 86.02 points per game! Even the Philadelphia 76ers are averaging more points per game than that!... 91.5, in case you were wondering), he finished the season among the top 8. From Week 7 onward, his team scored 5th lowest or worse in each of the games (2 games @ 5th lowest, 2 games @ 3rd lowest, 1 game @ 2nd lowest, and 2 games @ absolute lowest). And yet they finished that 7-week stretch with a 4-3 record (which included a 0.30-point margin of victory over his Bae), and a ticket to the big dance. I'm not sure I can spin it any other way - it's pretty much a Cinderella story of Cinderella stories. Here's to hoping that story continues... Oh what?? Starting Johnny Manziel?? Nevermind.
11. Chou Chainz (4-9) [10]
Aaron had some kick in his team during the last half of the season, going 3-3 in the last 6 games. But his abominable 1-6 record in the first 7 games held him down too much. In all fairness, his team had the 2nd hardest Strength of Schedule (playing Gabs and Jeff twice), but it honestly all broke down the minute Yahoo! autodrafted for him. He spent a combined $65 on Zac Stacy and C.J. Spiller. #2014Lulz
12. OUCHsoclose (3-10) [11]
Jamaal going down was a dagger that Andrew just couldn't fully recover from. It's ok, doing poorly happens to almost all first-year managers in this league, for some reason. Just look at Abraham and Duke - they were pretty much in your position last year, and look where they are now. I will say, though, the added smack talkery and banter coming from Andrew was a much-welcomed addition to our league.
Monday, December 1, 2014
#2014Lulz
The regular season is just about over, and the playoff teams are all but set. It has been a memorable season for me, with many thanks to all of you. So here's a look back at a 2014 fantasy football season and all the #lulz it brought.
The things I enjoyed most about this season. #2014Lulz:
- We did the auction draft, and everybody loved it!... Right??
- The inception of #MondayLulz:
- David: i clicked on Monday by accident and now Lulz is on my calender. i aint even mad.
- We de-bunked the Timmy Curse. I'm not going to prove it entirely here, but seeing as how my prediction record will be greater than 0.500, I think it's safe to say my predicting people to win does not cause them to lose. For deeper analysis, contact Luke.
- Our somewhat disturbing obsession with visual data... and that moment Jeff realized all his pictures on the internet could be seen around the world:
- David Lin: I hate you Tim.
- Tim: What did I do this time?
Oh, was it this? ffnuthang.blogspot.com
aka my witty-yet-insightful-yet-moderately-uninformed Fantasy Football Blog that is loved by all around the world? Jeff repping Palestine wut. What I want to know is why so many Eastern Europeans are interested in Fantasy Football.#MONDAYLULZ - Jeff: HAHA this is awesome! And only about 15% of the awesome is due to its tabular nature. Just imagine how awesome it'd be in pie form.
- Luke: Did someone ask for PIE??
- Justina: You had me at pie.
- Luke: Or perhaps a doughnut?
- Justina: Be still my fat clogged heart.
- ...
- Jeff: Tim- Seeing as to how global our blog is in terms of distribution, can you please take down the not so manly photos of me and use another picture instead? You know... Internet. Open source, etc.
- Tim: ...to respect that 0.1% chance of something going wrong, I will take those amazing photos down. And if anyone else wants his or her photo down, let me know.
- Andrew: I would like mine taken down and replaced with the photo of Jeff and Brady. Thank you respecting my wishes.
- Luke: I second Andrew's request.I would also posit that the Jeff/Brady photo is hardly the most incriminating of Jeff's online photo oeuvre.
- Which eventually developed into this:
- Abraham's Defenses, and the discovery of the cubix:
- Andrew: What do you call a 3-d square?
- Jeff: A cube? A cubix?
- Andrew: ABRAHAM!! Sorry Abraham. For some reason I thought Jeff was the one with three d's... Now I'm just randomly beefing. -_-
- David Li: HAHAHA.Also what's a cubix?
- Justina: ALSO why does Abraham have 3 defenses for real?!
- ~~Game of the Season~~
- Errrbody beating up on Eric with the smack talkery:
- Eric expresses his love for Knile, and then curses his FFL thanks to Josh McCown:
- Aaron: $51 for 1 weeks of points haha
- Andrew: Lol!!! Eric be ballin!
- Tim: Guys, you're making Eric sad now. That's not nice.
- Eric: Charles is made of glass. He WILL get hurt again.. you just watch. best $51 I ever spent!
- David Lin: Why would you start mccown over flacco eric? I don't feel bad for your team anymore haha
- Luke:
- Eric: I was trying to make a smooth move. I opened up yahoo sports and they had Mccown and Douglas as "sleepers" for this week.. FMFFL. just FMFFL.
- In response to me beating Eric, pending a miracle from Eli and Reuben Randle:
- Eric: The chances of Eli and Randle combining for 74 points tonight are about as likely as Poon making the playoffs... lol sorry
- Justina:
- Eric: and Tim's MondayLulz this week (WITH VISUALS) are awesome. We should let him win some more guys.. Cause when he does, we all benefit
- David Lin: You didn't let him win. He beat you
- Justina:
- Andrew: Or as likely as Eric starting Knile Davis behind Jamaal. Oh wait... Nvm.
- Andrew reminding Eric that Eric got beat twice by Andrew's bottom-dwelling team:
- Eric: Why do I have a strong feeling Jamauling Charles is gonna blow up tonight?? Oh dear, I'm gonna lose to Poon this week..
- Andrew: That would be a first... oh wait... nvm...
- Eric: LOL that's what I'm saying! You already beat me once! but we were 0-0..now you're a "bottom dweller" in the league with Chubs ;)
- Justina:
- But best of all? The finishing stats for Odoyle rules!:
- Overall Record: 6-7
- Final Standing: 9th Overall
- Made Playoffs? No
- Points For: ~1190 (9th in the league)
- Record v. Unicorn Burps: 2-0
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