Week 5 #PowerRankings - Hawaiian Food Comp Edition!

Aloha from Hawaii! This week’s #PowerRankings came late and will be short and sweet, but with inspiration from being in our country’s 50th state, I’ve decided to do a Hawaiian Food Comp because the food here is delicious.

1. MyRavensStackIsntWorkingOut (Eric) (3-2) [1]

Welcome back, Mark Andrews!.. as the 3rd most productive TE on your own team. 41 points from Lamar Jackson is nice though, #1 QB in FF right now. Maybe Eric won't need a Ravens stack, he just needs Lamar.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Kalua Pork

This classic Hawaiian dish is probably what most people think of first when they think of Hawaiian food - it’s the main event at a luau and usually a hit with any non-vegetarian.

2. Breece Mode (Haji) (1-4) [3]

After a strong start to the season, Haji’s last 2 weeks have been looking suspect. In spite of Chuba being a solid piece, the rest of Haji’s team hasn’t been able to put it together. However, no team has really made a strong case to be up here based on consistent performance the last 2 weeks (except maybe Jeff Chen or Andrew’s team..), so Haji’s team kind of ends up here by default.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Spam Musubi

Spam Musubi is delicious. It’s hard to mess up rice, Spam, and seaweed. It’s a superior grab-and-go food that meets all of your basic dietary needs. So what’s wrong with it? Why can’t you just eat Spam Musubi for every meal? Haji’s team has been a similar conundrum - it’s got all the ingredients needed for a good team. Then why does it have a (1-4) record and is sitting at 11th in the standings? Has the Spam gone bad? Is that even possible? Is too much of a good thing turning into a bad thing? Who knows.

3. 第六 (Abraham) (2-3) [4]

It seems like Abraham’s been one step ahead of the rest of us in terms of picking up next week’s waiver RBs - a few weeks back picking up Braelon Allen and more recently picking up Roschon Johnson. He had the patience to keep Tank Bigsby, too. His team didn’t look so great to start the season, but in spite of the Week 5 loss, it’s been on a roll as of late.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Loco Moco

Loco Moco is basically rice, a hamburger patty, gravy, and a fried egg. At first sight, it doesn't look super appetizing. But then you take a bite and you understand why people like it. As Joey Tribbiani would say, “Rice? Good. Hamburger? Good. Gravy? Good. Egg? Good.” Abraham's process has been sound, all of his ingredients are solid, and although the team didn't start the season looking sexy, it has hit the spot and gotten the job done.

4. Run It Back! (Gabs) (4-1) [6]

Gabs’s team has been solid in spite of some QB woes. He’s made some good calls on unproven players, including Tyrone Tracy this week, and it’s gotten him to 2nd in league standings. His Points For is middle of the pack, but his team looks decent with the core of Kenneth Walker, Brock Bowers, and Brian Thomas (who he has yet to start) - which sounds weird when you repeat it out loud.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Malasadas

Malasadas are basically jelly-filled donuts that at first appearance seem like imitation donuts - what’s the big deal, there are plenty of jelly-filled donuts on the mainland. Well, malasadas are different. The texture of the dough is superior, the flavors of the jelly are superior, and it’s just overall a delicious experience. Gabs’s team has not appeared all that impressive at first glance, but sitting at (4-1) and #2 in the standings means he has a superior team, at least at the moment.

5. Love thy Naber (Jeff Lin) (3-2) [2]

Jeff Lin’s team is in a free fall. Injuries came all at once for his team, and the future is looking a little tenuous for Jeff, at least in the short-term.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Shaved Ice

Jeff Lin’s team started the season off so well, like the top of a shaved ice - covered in condensed milk, toppings, and syrup - so delicious. But by the time you get to the bottom of the shaved ice, it has melted into watery syrup. Jeff's team has melted into watery syrup.

6. I am not sacko! (Jeff Chen) (3-2) [8]

I’m not sure how he’s doing it, but he’s doing it. Jeff Chen continues to dominate his foes, this time slaying Luke with 43 points from Joe Burrow. Nico’s health will have an affect on Jeff’s short-term outlook, but Jeff has proven his team deserves respect.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Poi

I know there’s a whole island of people that like this stuff, but I just don’t get it. It’s just mashed up taro, right? It doesn’t look all that appetizing, doesn’t taste all that appetizing, but I guess it has some nutritional value. It’s like Jeff’s team - it doesn’t look all that good, but there’s been some value in it. I still don’t get it, though.

7. Unicorn QueenZ (Tim) (4-1) [10] 

Although my team is #1 in the league standings, I’m still not convinced it deserves to be much higher in the rankings. I do like the trajectory that JaMarr Chase and Jayden Daniels have been taking, and Brian Robinson has been more than a pleasant surprise. I’ll keep riding Kareem Hunt until the wheels fall off, too. I don’t know how sustainable all of this will be, but I’m going to enjoy this moment while it’s here.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Saimin

Saimin is basically an inferior cousin to ramen. Don’t get me wrong, Saimin is still good. But if you ask me which I’d prefer, it’s ramen 10/10 times. Ramen tends to have a more flavorful broth and more interesting toppings. My team feels like an imitator, not a true contender. It’s still good and gets the job done, but I think there’s better out there.

8. Terrific Tortoises (David) (2-3) [7]

David miraculously survived his bye-pocalypse / bye-mageddon with some deft waiver moves and much help from Joe Flacco. How his team will fare moving forward is still unknown, but I have confidence in David to continue to figure things out.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Chicken Long Rice

I’m not an expert, but Chicken Long Rice feels very basic. I get that it’s comfort food, but it’s just bean noodles with chicken and some garnishes. It feels like you just took some leftovers or whatever was in the fridge and put together something just to say you had a meal. It has felt like David has scoured his fridge to try and put something resembling a team together due to so many unforeseen circumstances. The result has been very basic and underwhelming, but it still counts as a team.

9. Spider Pig (Luke) (3-2) [5]

Luke’s team got embarrassed by none other than Jeff Chen’s team in Week 5. I think brighter days are ahead with Saquon back in action, but this one will sting for a while now that Jeff has bragging rights over Luke.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Poke Bowl

Supposedly the cuts of fish they use for poke bowls are generally the end cuts or the parts that are less desirable compared to the prime sashimi cuts. Luke has taken the inferior cuts of fish (provided by Yahoo autodraft) and have somehow mixed them together with some shoyu and delicious toppings to make a (3-2) bowl of poke. 

10. Go DJ that’s my CJ (and AJ) (Andrew) (2-3) [11]

Andrew’s team still doesn’t look pretty, but it got the job done in Week 5. The Tucker Kraft pickup and start was nice, as was the Trey Sermon pickup (even though Rhamondre and Rico did pretty well on the bench). Hopefully DJ Moore can continue to produce, in which case I could see Andrew’s team continue to ascend.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Mac Salad

Mac Salad is solid. But it’s not a main dish, it’s a side. Andrew’s team has not felt main-dish worthy for much of the season. Even though his last 2 weeks have been a big improvement, I think it still has a bit to go before it proves it belongs in the main dish category. For now, it’ll still be a solid side dish.

11. Maybabyboo (Laura) (1-4) [12]

I do feel 1% bad for beating Laura, especially since she got the 2nd highest score in Week 5. But as she alluded to, at least she now knows her team can score this many points, and hopefully this will be a foreshadowing of things to come. I do think Travis Kelce, James Cook, Darnell Mooney, and Christian Kirk should continue to provide stability that Laura can build off of.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Lau Lau

Lau Lau is basically meat (pork and / or fish) wrapped in taro leaves and steamed. First off, it doesn’t look that great - it’s just a big steamed green wrapped piece of something. Secondly, I’ve found it can be hit or miss - I’ve had some good and I’ve had some bad. The good can be moist and flavorful, the bad can somehow be dry and bland. Laura’s team hasn’t looked the best on paper, and has also been a mixed bag of good and bad, depending on the week.

12. choubacca (Aaron) (2-3) [9]

Aaron’s team continues to unravel as his star players aren’t so star anymore. He had what looked to be such a strong team to start the season, but after 5 weeks, he finds himself competing for the lowest in Points For.

Hawaiian Food Comp: Halo Halo

If you’ve never had it before, Halo Halo is a Filipino dessert made of crushed ice, evaporated milk, and various fruits, beans, and toppings. It’s actually very colorful and appealing to the eyes, but I’m not a fan. The random textures and flavors all mixed together doesn’t work, in my opinion. Aaron’s team looked very appealing to start the season, but as the season has progressed, it’s turned out to be pretty disappointing.

Week 4 #PowerRankings - 🧢 Edition

Sometimes you just have to admit when you’re wrong, and that’s what I’m doing this week with the #PowerRankings 🧢 Edition. Isn't that what kids these days call it? Cap no cap. Anyways, I went back on the previous #PowerRankings to see when I made bad predictions or gave bad advice, and decided to lay it out this week. 

1. MyRavensStackIsntWorkingOut (Eric) (2-2) [2]

Eric’s team lost, but his team scored the most points of the top-tier teams in our league, so it gets a slight bump up in the rankings. Mark Andrews is a problem, though. I would have expected Eric to go harder for a TE in waivers, or maybe trade for one, but he may be rolling the dice another week, waiting for the Andrews breakout. Alternatively, it could be triple zeroes. The production Eric has been getting from Kamara, Lamar, Diggs, and co. have been enough to keep his team scary, though.

🧢: “He should be set at QB with Lamar Jackson, and I do like the Lamar-Mark Andrews stack to boot. But his WRs are turrible. Stefon Diggs would have been a great WR1 a year ago. Now I’m not even sure I’d want him as a WR2 or Flex. George Pickens is in what looks to be an awful Pittsburgh offense, and Ladd / Jameson / Adonai are all unproven.”

I was wrong about Mark Andrews, but I was also very wrong about Eric’s WRs - Stefon Diggs and George Pickens have done well for him so far, hence the #1 ranking.

2. Love thy Naber (Jeff Lin) (3-1) [1]

Jeff Lin had a dud week with zero from Pitts and sub-par production from his QB and RBs. It looks like he may have to keep rolling with Pitts for now, but I expect his other options to do better. Starting Andy Dalton at QB is bold, but probably wiser than starting Caleb Williams.

🧢: “Having 2 rookie WRs as potential starters - in Harrison and Nabers - could be dangerous (lots of boom-bust potential)”

I wasn’t super sold on either Harrison or Nabers, but they’ve both been anchoring Jeff’s team so far this season (minus Harrison’s slow Week 1). They’ve been pretty consistent, too - especially Nabers - his target numbers are ridiculous.

3. Breece Mode (Haji) (1-3) [3]

This week felt like a fluke week for Haji’s team. Breece Hall, Josh Allen, and even Devin Singletary should bounce back, so I fully expect Haji’s team to recover from this down week. Justin Jefferson is still awesome, and Chuba will continue to produce for at least 3-4 more weeks, if not for longer.

🧢: “he struggled to draft a reliable RB2 or TE. While Singletary and Hubbard are current starters on their respective teams, those teams aren’t very good.. so getting reliable production from them is questionable.”

I was dead wrong on Singletary and Hubbard - well, maybe half wrong about Hubbard. Both have provided solid RB2 / Flex production for Haji, and have turned out to be one of his stronger suits.

4. 第六 (Abraham) (2-2) [8]

Congrats again to the Week 4 #HighScore - it feels like Abraham’s team is starting to click on all cylinders with Kyren and Gibbs being super reliable RB options, Kincaid being as good of a TE as you’ll get right now, and his WRs continuing to produce. With Jordan Love back in the fold, I think Abraham’s stock is trending way upwards.

🧢: “But Jordan Love is a head-scratcher for me. At $5, I feel like Abraham could have gotten him in the draft if he really wanted him. But maybe Abraham sees something I don’t?”

Love was injured in Week 1 and out a couple of weeks, but he looks legit - keeping him for $5 should prove to be a good deal for Abraham.

5. Spider Pig (Luke) (3-1) [4]

Luke’s team got hit with some injuries to Devonta Smith and Ekeler, forcing him to start Iosivas. But I don’t think Mahomes is the QB Luke needs to be starting moving forward. Could we really be looking at a Darnold-Addison? 

🧢: “Luke got screwed by Yahoo Autodraft.”

I still have no idea how Austin Ekeler is still a thing, but DeVonta Smith, Jordan Addison, and Zach Charbonnet have all contributed to Luke’s success so far. Maybe Autodraft isn’t so bad after all..

6. Run It Back! (Gabs) (3-1) [6]

Gabs pulls out the win with an impressive performance by Kenneth Walker. Diontae Johnson has been getting a bunch of targets with Dalton at QB, and Brian Thomas Jr probably shouldn’t be hanging out on Gabs’s bench anymore. The potential Jonathan Taylor injury is cause for concern, but that Bucky Irving stash provides some insurance. The jury still seems to be out on Aaron Rodgers and Garrett Wilson, though.

🧢: “The biggest weakness is at TE, where an unproven rookie Brock Bowers may end up being Gabs’s Achilles Heel.”

I was wrong about Brock Bowers - even though his production has slowed down recently, he looks to be as good of a TE in fantasy as any right now.

7. Terrific Tortoises (David) (1-3) [5]

I genuinely feel bad for David. I guess Rashee Rice hasn’t officially been ruled out for the season, but to have David (wisely) designate Rice as a keeper and to see the potential Rice had for becoming one of the best WRs in fantasy this year makes it all the more devastating. Losing Rashee Rice puts a damper on David’s future outlook, but if he can somehow survive this week’s bye-pocalypse, I think his team will still be ok. To try and keep it positive, his team’s Points For remains middle of the pack, so his (1-3) record doesn’t reflect how many points his team has been putting up.

🧢: “I can also see Rashee Rice paying dividends at his keeper value, but I may have leaned towards trying to keep Ja’Marr Chase, even at an elevated value, to secure that monster RB1+WR1 combo.”

I was skeptical about Rice, but he has returned much better value than Chase so far this season. Rest of season is TBD.

8. I am not sacko! (Jeff Chen) (2-2) [11]

It’s hard to keep Jeff Chen’s team near the bottom of the rankings after it scored the 2nd most points this week. And he did it off the back of Nico Collins. I’ll admit that his team is stepping up and looks better than it did pre-season. 

🧢: “I mean, I guess Nico Collins is a good value at $18 but he’s not a shoo-in to be a bonafide WR2, either. But again, no one on Jeff’s team is really a shoo-in to be a bonafide AnyPosition2.”

I was wrong about a lot of things regarding Jeff’s team, including Nico. I didn’t expect David Montgomery to do so well, and was bearish on JK Dobbins as well.

9. choubacca (Aaron) (2-2) [7]

I’m surprised Aaron was able to pull out a win with Tyreek Hill on the bench, but CeeDee Lamb stepped up alongside James Conner and Zach Moss. Tyreek Hill’s status will be TBD depending on who is playing QB in Miami, but if Aaron can continue to get production from Jauan Jennings, he may be able to hold on until (if) Tua returns. But as it stands right now, Aaron’s outlook doesn’t look great.

🧢: “Overall, Aaron should have a pretty solid start to the season.”

I had Aaron’s team ranked #1 at the beginning of the season, but for various reasons (Tyreek, Rachaad White, LaPorta-Potty), it has been underperforming.

10. Unicorn QueenZ (Tim) (3-1) [9] 

I lucked out this week with Luke’s team putting up a dud week. I think I have to get over Kyler and just put Jayden Daniels in there no matter what from here on out. Having McBride and Davante out didn’t help, but honestly I think my team might hit an upswing with the rise of Daniels, Jayden Reed, and Xavier Worthy. Still not sold, though, so I’ll keep my team lower in the rankings - it more accurately reflects my low Points For versus my (3-1) record.

🧢: “I had some #regretz drafting Davante Adams again - as Jeff alluded to, you’d think I’d learn from last year. But the difference is he was my WR1 last year. Having paid WR2 price for him, I think I can live with his volatility.”

Davante Adams was a bad decision.. Unless maybe he gets traded?

11. Go DJ that’s my CJ (and AJ) (Andrew) (1-3) [12]

I didn’t think Derrick Henry still had it in him. With his monster performance and a solid showing from CJ Stroud, Andrew’s team was able to climb out of Sacko position for now. The problem is sustainability - without AJ Brown, it’s hard to see where Andrew gets consistent weekly production outside of Derrick Henry.

🧢: “Andrew’s WRs are his strong suit, with AJ and DJ anchoring that corps. McLaurin will be a really good Flex play, and that’ll give Andrew some time to evaluate JSN, Doubs, and Shaheed.”

Andrew’s WRs haven’t been terrible given the circumstances, but definitely aren’t his strong suit anymore, with AJ Brown injured and DJ Moore and Terry McLaurin underperforming.

12. Maybabyboo (Laura) (1-3) [10]

Laura’s team had a rough week. Perhaps it was better that Andrew’s team ended up doing so well, because all those bench points probably wouldn’t have led to a win anyways. The season is far from over for Laura, especially with Kelce likely being the biggest benefactor from Rashee Rice’s absence. Her bench points should also provide some hope that at least her team has the potential to put up points on any given week. Joe Mixon’s return should also help.

🧢: “Cut: D’Andre Swift - I know he’s a starting RB in the league, and with RB depth being so shallow, it’s hard to cut someone like that. But he just feels like a wasted roster spot. The fact that Laura is willing to start Cam Akers over him should say something.”

Let’s just say I’m glad Laura didn’t end up cutting Swift.